When To Stop Talking To & Chasing A Girl: The Hard Truth

Unfortunately, more often than not, if you feel like you are chasing a girl, it's not because she is playing hard to get. Instead, it's likely because she's not into you.
Guy chasing women at restaurant

When you are chasing women, there are two likely outcomes.

First, you will be successful in your pursuit and land the girl.

Second, you will fail miserably and get nowhere with her.

The problem is that it can be hard to tell which is the more outcome. So even if you think you’re succeeding, it’s always possible that you’re really just setting yourself up for heartache and rejection.

Unfortunately, more often than not, if you feel like you are chasing a girl, it’s not because she is playing hard to get. Instead, it’s likely because she’s not into you.

If you’re finding yourself wondering, “should I keep talking to her?” more often than not, the answer is no.

It can be tough to walk away from someone you think you have a connection with, but if she’s not reciprocating your feelings, it’s time to stop pursuing her.

When women play hard to get, you will still get signals that she is interested, even if she’s not outright pursuing you.

If you’re getting mixed signals or she’s becoming more distant, move on until your find the right person.

What does chasing a girl mean?

Chasing a girl means pursuing her romantically or sexually even though she is not showing you any signs that she is interested.

This can be done for many reasons, such as wanting to feel wanted or needed, being afraid of rejection, or thinking that you can change her mind.

However, more often than not, it simply leads to frustration, as the girl is not actually interested and is just stringing you along.

You should never chase a girl and spend time understanding what clear signs she’s not interested in you are.

If the girl you are chasing is giving you any of the following signals, it’s time to stop wasting your time and move on.

Guy chasing a woman

Do girls like to be chased?

Many girls are turned off by guys who chase them, as it shows a lack of confidence and self-esteem.

In the dating world, there can be a fine line between chasing a woman and courting a woman.

Understand that it is not courting if the interest is one-sided. If you are the only one pursuing, then you are chasing.

woman not paying attention to a guy

When should you stop chasing a girl?

When you chase women, you are giving up your power as the leader of your own life, and she becomes the driver.

This is not an attractive quality in a man, and it will only lead to frustration on your part.

Women are attracted to men who are in control of their own lives and take charge when necessary. If you find that you are chasing women more than they are chasing you, it’s time to re-evaluate your approach.

Uninterested girl on her phone

If she does not respond to your texts or calls

People are genuinely busy, but on average, people still check their phones every 12 minutes.

If she is feeling you, she will at least let you know she is busy and will get back to you when available. However, if she consistently does not respond or blows you off, it’s time to move on.

When she starts making excuses

If a woman starts making excuses as to why she can’t see you or why she is too busy, it’s time to stop pursuing her.

When there is genuine attraction and interest, she will put in an effort to find time to be with you.

Girl not talking on date

If she never opens up

When you want to get to know someone, you will open up to a certain point depending on how much you like them.

If she never opens up about her life, interests, or feelings, it’s a sign that she is not really open to getting to know you on a deeper level.

If everything continues to be surface level, then make sure she is not using you for your attention or resources.

If you feel like you are doing all the work

In any relationship, both parties should be equally invested. If it feels like you are putting in all the effort and she is not meeting you halfway, then it’s a sign that she is not that into you.

An interested woman will make an effort to see you, text you, and spend time with you without being asked or prompted.

You should never have to chase someone who is actually interested in you.

When she talks about other guys

If the woman you are chasing constantly talks about other guys, she may be subtly implying that you are just a friend.

A woman will not talk about other men with you when she wants to progress things because she wants to keep the focus on you.

If she is always talking about her ex or other men, it’s a clear sign that she is not feeling you, and you should move on.

woman texting on a date

She always seems distracted

You want a woman that feels like you are worth chasing.

If you spend time with her, but her phone seems more important than getting to know you, or she seems like she keeps zoning out during a conversation, it’s not a good sign.

Being present is important when you are with someone you want to pursue. However, if she can’t even focus on you for short periods, move on with your life.

Woman with her ex boyfriend

She is still getting over a breakup

Suppose she is still getting over a guy. In that case, she is not emotionally available to open up to you or pursue anything further.

Emotional baggage from a past relationship will poison any chance of a current one, and it’s not worth your time.

You should only pursue a woman who is emotionally available and ready for something new.

Guy texting a girl

She never flirts back

If you send a flirty text message and she never reciprocates, it’s a sign that she is not interested.

Women are attracted to men who make them feel good, and a simple flirtatious remark can go a long way.

If you are putting in the effort to flirt with her and she doesn’t even bother responding, it’s probably time to give up.

Man and Woman on trip together

She never talks about the future

When you are with someone you can see yourself with long-term, there is a natural inclination to start planning for the future.

If she never brings up anything beyond the immediate present, it’s probably because she doesn’t see a future with you.

If you never hear things like, “I want to show you my favorite spot,” or “I can’t wait to see what happens with us,” it’s a sign that you are not on the same page.

It’s not going anywhere

You know what your want in a relationship, and if she isn’t on the same page, it’s not worth your time.

Suppose you want something serious, and she only wants something casual. In that case, there is no reason to continue pursuing her because you will only end up getting hurt.

Setting standards for yourself is important; if she doesn’t meet them, you should move on.

You deserve someone who wants the same things as you and is willing to put in the effort to make it happen.

Girl not interested in guy

You have been friend zoned

If a woman truly wants more, she will not introduce you like a friend.

If you hear things like, “This is my friend so-and-so,” it’s a sign that she sees you in the friend zone and is not interested in anything further.

When you are introduced as a friend, it means that she has no intention of taking things to the next level.

Now, this is not just about using the word friend. So, for example, if it’s early on and there has only been a date or two, then she may introduce you as a friend.

There will be an unmistakable undertone of something more, but there are just not any labels on the relationship yet.

If you are unsure of the difference, you are likely seen as just a friend.

How do I stop chasing her?

You should never chase in the first place, but if you do, there are some things you can do to stop.


The first step is to realize that you are chasing. This can be difficult if you are caught up in the moment. Still, it’s important to take a step back and assess the situation objectively.

Know when it’s time to give up hope and maintain a sense of dignity. There is no reason to continue chasing someone who has made it clear they are not interested.

Focus on yourself

When you are constantly chasing someone, it’s easy to lose sight of your own needs.

It’s important to focus on yourself and what you want in life. Don’t let someone else control your happiness.

It can sometimes feel like you don’t, but you have more control over your situation than you realize.

Don’t let a pretty face and beautiful body make you believe anything less.

As you continue to move as a high-value man or soon-to-be one, you will meet more women that are worth your time.

Give yourself options

If your ultimate goal is to get a girlfriend, that can sometimes blur your vision.

It’s important to keep your options open and not get too caught up in any one person.

Continue to do what’s necessary to build yourself, and you will get more girls to like you.

Work on your self-esteem

Doing things like focusing on your health and fitness can make a big difference.

It’s also important to surround yourself with people that build you up and make you feel good about yourself.

Don’t be afraid to get rid of toxic relationships in your life. They will only drag you down and make it harder for you to succeed.

Change your mindset

The final piece of advice is to change your mindset. Women are attracted to men that they perceive as having high value.

If you see yourself as someone who is chasing after women, then that’s exactly how they will see you.

It’s important to think of yourself as a catch and someone that women should be chasing after.

This doesn’t mean you should be arrogant or cocky, but you need to walk the line of being confident without crossing over into that territory.

You can do this by continuing to work on building yourself up and pursuing your goals.

When you have a strong foundation, it will be easier for you to attract women and not chase after them.

How do I know if I am chasing?

If you are constantly trying to see her, text her, or talk to her but don’t hear back or keep getting blown off, then you are chasing.

Most men, when being honest with themselves, know that they are chasing but choose to ignore the signs.

It’s important to listen to your gut and trust your instincts on this one. If you feel like you are chasing, then you most likely are.


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