It’s hard to know what she’s sometimes thinking. Does she want a relationship, or is she just stringing you along?
Navigating the dating world can be tricky, and it’s even more challenging when you’re unsure where you stand with someone.
When she’s ready for a relationship, she’ll give you some pretty clear signs. But if she’s not ready, she might send mixed signals, which can be confusing and frustrating.
It could also mean you did just like many other guys and screwed it up. You could have come on too strong, or she might have caught feelings for you before she was ready.
We’ll explore some signs she’s not ready for a relationship below.
Is it possible to have feelings for someone and not be ready for a relationship?
It is absolutely possible to have feelings for someone and not be ready for a relationship.
There are so many factors that can stop someone from wanting to enter into a serious relationship.
Maybe she’s not over her last relationship. Maybe she’s busy with work or school and doesn’t have the time to invest in a new partner.
Maybe she’s just not ready to open herself up to someone new.
Whatever the reason, it’s perfectly normal to have feelings for someone without wanting to pursue a relationship.
The important thing is that you actually hear them and act accordingly. Trying to change her mind or up the attention you give her will only backfire.
Why isn’t she ready for a relationship with you?
It’s likely, she’s feeling a combination of things. Still, there are some key reasons she might not want to enter into a relationship with you.
She’s Not Over Her Last Relationship
This is a big one. If she is not over her last relationship, she is probably not ready to start something new.
It doesn’t matter how long it’s been since she and her ex broke up. If she’s still thinking about him, she’s not ready for you.
The last thing you want to happen is her going back to her ex after you’ve put in all the work to pursue her.
Sure this can happen at any point in the relationship, but the odds significantly increase when she’s not over her last relationship.
There’s a good chance she’ll compare you to him, and you’ll likely come up short. So it’s best to move on and find someone ready for something new.
She doesn’t have time for a relationship
If she’s busy with work or school, she might not have the time to invest in a new partner.
She might be interested in you, but she might not be able to give you the attention you want.
Or she just rather put her energy into the things she’s passionate about.
It’s not personal. She just might not have the time for a relationship right now. It doesn’t mean she’ll never want one. She just might not be ready right now.
Women are often told that they can have it all, but the truth is, sometimes they just can’t.
There will be a point where they must choose, and sometimes that means putting our personal lives on the back burner.
She’s not ready to open up
She might not be ready to let someone new into her life.
This could be for any number of reasons. Maybe she’s been hurt in the past, or perhaps she’s just not ready to get emotionally invested in someone new.
Relationships require trust, and she might not be ready to give that just yet.
She just might need some more time to open up. But, if you can be patient, she might come around eventually.
She’s not sure she wants a relationship
She might be enjoying the single life, and she’s not sure she’s ready for commitment.
Or, she might not be sure she wants a relationship with you specifically. She might be interested in someone else.
The best partner for you will want you without convincing.
She doesn’t want to get hurt
She might be scared of getting her heart broken again.
If she’s been hurt in the past or has seen a lot of unhealthy relationships, she might not be ready to put herself out there.
This is entirely understandable, and you should try to be patient with her.
Past trauma can take its toll. It’s great that she recognizes this about herself.
Respect it and move on. It’s best for you in the long run if she works out her issues before getting into a relationship.
She’s playing hard to get
The subtle art of playing hard to get is a common dating strategy. And it’s one she might be using on you.
It can be challenging to tell the difference between a girl playing hard to get and a girl who is genuinely not interested, but there are some key things you can look for.
She’s not ready for a relationship, but she doesn’t want to lose your interest either. So she’s playing it cool and keeping you at a distance.
This can be frustrating, but it’s important to remember that you can’t make someone want a relationship with you.
If she’s not ready, the best thing you can do is respect her wishes and move on.
She’s leading you on
This is a tough one. Maybe she’s giving you mixed signals, or she’s just stringing you along.
Either way, it’s not fair to you.
She’s not ready for a relationship, but she’s enjoying the attention you’re giving her. She’s happy to keep things casual and not interested in anything more.
The sooner you can recognize this, the better. You deserve someone who wants the same things as you do.
She’s not attracted to you
Your physical appearance matters. And she might not be attracted to you.
It sounds shallow, but it’s the truth. She might find you unattractive, or she might not be into your type.
There’s nothing you can do about this. If she’s not attracted to you, she will not want a committed relationship with you.
The best thing you can do is move on.
She put you in the friend zone
This is painful for many guys, but being friend zoned is pretty common.
She gets to spend time with you and gets all the benefits without having to put any relationship labels on it.
It’s not fair, but it happens. And if she’s put you in the friend zone, she’s probably not interested in anything more.
She’s using you
This is the worst possible scenario.
She’s not interested in you and she’s telling you what she thinks you want to hear.
She’s using you for your attention, time, or money. And she has no intention of ever being in a long-term relationship with you.
If you think she might be using you, it’s time to end things.
This should be, without question, a deal breaker.
Don’t push things that are obvious signs she’s not ready for a relationship.
When she says she’s “not ready,” she means it in the sense that she doesn’t want a relationship with you. It has nothing to do with timing.
She could be “not ready” today and “ready” tomorrow. But if she’s not interested in you specifically, pushing things will only make things worse.
The bottom line is that you can’t make someone want a relationship with you. All you can do is respect her wishes and move on.
What should I do when a girl likes me but is not ready for a relationship?
Most guys would say you should just walk away and forget about her. But this isn’t always the best advice.
Yes, she might not be ready for a relationship, but that doesn’t mean she will never be ready.
So what do you do to keep the frame that she is not a priority but also give you a chance down the road?
Don’t pressure her
No one likes to feel pressured when it comes to relationships. And she certainly won’t appreciate you trying to guilt her into one.
This will only push her away and make her less likely to ever want a relationship with you.
Keep the frame that a soon-to-be or high-value guy like yourself has options.
Stop texting so often
You only want to give her enough attention so she can see what you bring to the table but not so much that she gets smothered.
A good rule of thumb is to text her only when she texts you first. This way, she knows you’re interested, but she also knows that you’re not going to be at her beck and call.
Make plans with other people
It’s important to keep your life balanced while waiting for her to be ready.
This means making plans with others and not just sitting around waiting for her to call or text you.
Having a life outside of her will make you more attractive to her and help you move on if she’s never going to be ready.
Stop chasing her
Chasing a woman who is completely closed off is an easy way to bring down your value.
If she’s not interested, she’s not interested. And there’s nothing you can do to change that.
Let her see you living your best life.
When you cross paths, show confident body language, make strong eye contact and be sure to smile.
You want her to see that you’re doing just fine without her.
The worst thing you can do is try to rush things or force a relationship before she’s ready.
It’s okay to take things slow if you feel like she is truly the one. However, don’t completely write her off like a crazy ex-girlfriend.
Keep her close enough and be patient.
When developing a romantic relationship, instant gratification shouldn’t be your goal.
If you are a great guy, don’t feel stressed or pressured to change her mind if she’s not ready for a relationship.
Don’t lose hope if it is genuinely a her thing and there’s not an issue with you.
This is not about her, but it can help you land her at some point.
Develop new skills, improve your looks, and make more money.
This will give you something to focus on so you’re not just sitting around waiting for her to be ready.
It will also make you a better catch when she finally is ready for a relationship.
You never know; focusing on yourself and leveling up could fill in some of the missing pieces that made her feel confused or scared about a relationship.
Frequently Ask Questions About A Girl Not Being Ready for a relationship
Should I wait for a girl who isn’t ready for a relationship?
You should not wait on a girl who isn’t ready for a relationship. You always want to remain in a constant state of growth, and putting a pause on your social life for a maybe could cause you to miss out on finding “the one.”
How long should you wait for someone who isn’t ready for a relationship?
There is no set amount of time you should wait for someone who isn’t ready for a relationship. The best thing you can do is focus on yourself and don’t wait around for her to be ready.
Don’t get so caught up in the idea of a girlfriend that you continue pursuing someone who doesn’t feel ready for more.
The right person will come along when the time is right.
What if she says she’s not ready for a relationship but still wants to talk?
If she says she’s not ready for a relationship but still wants to talk, you should continue talking to her. You can talk and be friends but don’t wait for her to change her mind about a relationship.
Is it better to start as friends before a relationship?
It is usually not better to start as friends before a relationship. This can lead to you hearing things like, “I don’t want to ruin the friendship.” Instead, she should know upfront if you want to be more than friends.
Once you are just a friend, getting out of that zone is difficult unless you are high value.
How long does it take for a girl to be ready for a relationship?
It can take a girl months or even years to be ready for a relationship. And some girls may never be ready for a relationship with you. This is why you should never wait on a girl to be ready for a relationship.
Don’t pass up on the opportunity of finding a new relationship with someone other than her.
What if she’s not ready, but she says she loves me?
If she’s not ready but says she loves you, she may just be caught up in the emotions. She may care for you deeply, but that doesn’t mean she’s ready for a relationship.
You should continue seeing other people and living your life. If she’s the one, she’ll eventually come around.
How do you make a girl fall in love quickly?
You can not make a girl fall in love with you quickly. This takes time and effort. You have to build a strong connection and bond with her.
You should never rush into a serious relationship. Instead, let things develop naturally, and she may start to fall for you on her own.